Selfishness

I will begin with a very controversial statement, and yet, one which is so easy to prove. It may at first seem cynical, but it is not. It is merely a statement of truth.

Every action made by every person who ever lived was selfish.

"But!" one might protest, "What about actions of selfless giving?"

"I give all the time! I sacrificed my time and pleasure to raise children and feed the poor!"

"What about," others state, "those who have committed their lives to the hungry? Or to those who have allowed themselves to die for a cause? These people were selfless, and not in any way selfish."

There could be nothing further from the truth.

People have many motives for doing acts which seem selfless, including the "negatives" of fear and pride, and the "positives", joy and fulfillment. But nevertheless, the person doing the giving is receiving. Otherwise, he would not be giving.

Why do people give to charities? The do so out of guilt, or to show the world what kind people they are, or to feel like they've made a difference. Why do people buy gifts for others? To strengthen relationships, to feel joy, and to be appreciated. Why do volunteers work in soup kitchens? To earn a place in heaven, to experience love, or to feel better about their own lives.

The most extreme example of sacrifice and kindness, in my mind, is Mother Teresa. This is a woman who gave her entire life to assist others. It is clear to me, that she found great personal joy in helping others.

"Keep the joy of loving God in your heart and share this joy with all you meet especially your family." Most of the pictures of Mother Teresa show her smiling. She was evidently happy because of her lifestyle.

Mother Teresa felt, in her own words, that she was a "pencil in God's hands". This, in and of itself, is a very powerful (and selfish) motive, the idea of being God's instrument to help the people of earth. I don't go so far as to call this pride, but it is definitely potent.

And I am sure that she fully expected to enter into heaven.

But what about those who die for a cause? What about Joan of Arc, or Patrick Henry, or even Jesus Christ? Each of them died selfishly.

First, I would like to point out that martyrs often don't have a choice. Some are caught by surprise, or imprisoned and they have no chance to escape.

But some are given a choice. Many martyrs were told that if they would only recant their statements or change sides, that they would be set free.

In those cases, even in their deaths for their causes, they were selfish. Their principles and ideals burned within them. The desire to change the world brings happiness, and the desire to prove one's self right at any cost is also a selfish motive.

There are those who wish to become immortal through the memory they leave behind. It is why many people write books, or create music and art, or have children. This is a selfish motive for becoming a martyr.

Yet the biggest reason for willing martyrdom would have to be real immortality. Most of history's martyrs believed in an afterlife, and believed that they would have a place in heaven for their convictions.

To back this point, it is difficult to find willing martyrs who did not believe in an afterlife of some kind. One of these few, Thomas Aikenhead, was likely a deist, and therefore would have still believed in an afterlife. Another, Hugh de Loeflet, may have not have actually intended to die. Those remaining relied on the previous motives, joy in ideals, satisfaction of being "right", and immortality through fame or by changing the world.

There is nothing wrong with being selfish. There is nothing wrong with helping someone for selfish and personal reasons, because we all act out of selfishness.

When one realizes that everyone is motivated by selfish desires, the basics of many inaccurate systems of thought can be torn down. We can be more honest with ourselves about our intentions, and through honesty, we can grow.